Counting My Blessings

I want to keep my streak of posting every week going even though some of the longer posts I have been working on aren't done yet. I decided, instead of a more typical post, to take pictures of my everyday life and share some of my blessings from the week. Counting my blessings points me to God and His faithfulness to me and helps ground me when I am overwhelmed, afraid, sad, or frustrated. How have you seen God in big and small ways this week?

God, I'm still counting my blessings

For all that You've done in my life
The more that I look in the details
The more of Your goodness I find
Father on this side of heaven
I know that I'll run out of time
But I will keep counting my blessings
Knowing I can't count that high

- Chorus, Counting My Blessings, Seph Schlueter

• Zoo trip with some cousins!

• A tiny harvest after the deer ate all of the tops last week, not too bad considering we planted in early July! I am always amazed when seeds put into the ground become plants and eventually fruit.

• Still flowering and making fruit even though it is fall!

• Our pool was closed last weekend and covered with a tarp. It's not nearly as aesthetically pleasing as a blue pool sparkling in the sunshine, but the reflection after a recent rain was lovely. 

• My daughter and I am made chocolate caramels. So delicious and fun!

• Cannot express how thankful I am for my daughter's positive homeschool volleyball experience this fall. 

• A preview of one of the blog posts I have been working on.

• I love listening to podcasts while I am doing chores or exercising. I never know how to best keep notes of the things I want to remember or think more about. My current plan has me scribbling on our dry erase board and hoping I eventually put the notes somewhere permanent. It is a good strategy for seeing the notes and reflecting throughout the day.

• Speaking of exercise, I am struggling to get into a good routine, but I am thankful for the times I do sneak it in. Anyone else spend the day in workout clothes and a cardigan, hoping to eventually use the workout clothes for working out?

• Sunlight, plants that are flourishing after almost dying during our move, and rainbows on the carpet.

• Fall leaf collected by while walking the dog and candy corns.

• One of the best parts of my week is teaching two elementary-aged girls language arts.

• As a recovering perfectionist, I try to make sure I joyfully laugh at myself instead of beat myself up when I do silly things, like try to carry these groceries without a cart. Thankfully I found an abandoned one halfway through the store. 

• My daughter brings so much beauty into my life!

• My wonderful hubby is back from another work trip! 

• I don't say he is the best dog ever like my daughter does, but I am thankful for this cutie all the time. 

Why Are You Afraid?

Many years ago, after my babies were born but before the deaths of my sister, MaryJo, and my son, Oliver, I completed the Bible Study “The Quest” by Beth Moore with a group of fellow military spouses. Unlike the majority of Beth Moore’s studies, “The Quest” is topical. It is designed to build intimacy with God through an exploration of questions found throughout the Bible. There are five main questions that kick off the study and continue to be a driving force throughout it:

1. Where are you? (God to Adam and Eve in the garden after they ate the fruit, Genesis 3:9)
2. Who told you that? (Genesis 3:11)
3. What are you seeking? (Jesus to two of John the Baptist’s disciples when they started following Him, John 1:38)
4. Why are you afraid? (Jesus to the disciples when they woke Him because they were terrified of a storm, Matthew 8:26)
5. How much more? (Jesus teaching His disciples and followers about the extent of God the Father's love and care for His children, Luke 11:13)

It was a unique study with a great group of ladies. Looking back, I can see it was a time of healing and preparation for me. One of the questions really transformed my thinking back then and stuck with me ever since. Why are you afraid? In fact, at the top of the page where this question was first introduced in the study, I wrote: “This question is powerful to me. The why has gotten me to God’s promises faster than what ever could.” Throughout the study, I kept mistakenly thinking the question was “What are you afraid of?”. It can be so easy to sit down and list all of the things we are afraid of. Often the list could go on forever as one fear leads to another and another and another. But God was using the study to gently challenge me not to focus on everything I was afraid of, but rather to think about why I was afraid and all the reasons I don't have to be afraid.

Asking why doesn’t result in a list of fears, but it does give space to look behind the fears and share with God all you are feeling and experiencing. To say, I am afraid because I love these kids so much, and I don’t want to mess them up. I am afraid because a terrible thing happened in my life, and it feels like the next terrible thing is right around the corner. Naming these whys is way more powerful and healing than endlessly listing fears.

Asking why quickly reminds us of all the reasons we don’t have to be afraid. For example, when I say I am afraid of messing up my kids, I can remember God loves them more than I do and has a plan and a purpose for them that I cannot thwart. We don't have to be afraid because God is powerful, in control, and keeps his promises.

I wanted to include a picture of the mums I bought at Aldi's.
Unfortunately some deer came up to our porch ate all the
open flowers! I found this one on the ground.

Songs, time in nature, and Bible verses all remind me I don't have to be afraid because even the winds and waves obey God. Here are some of the Bible verses I come back to again and again as I practice asking "Why are you afraid?":

The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Deuteronomy 31:8

I call out to the Lord, and he answers me from his holy mountain. Psalm 3:4

From the Lord comes deliverance. May your blessing be on your people. Psalm 3:8

I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Psalm 91:2

But now, this is what the Lord says—he who created you, Jacob, he who formed you, Israel: “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. Isaiah 43:1-2

What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all-how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Romans 8:31-32

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39

I often find myself feeling afraid. Sometimes I know exactly what I am afraid of, and other times it is just a feeling of unease within me. As I find myself going through a growing list of all the things I am afraid of or might be worried about, I try to stop and remind myself to try asking why instead of what. As I start telling God why I am afraid, I find room to process my feelings and also for my fear to be transformed by faith. Faith in Jesus, faith in His promises in the present, and faith in His promises yet to come.