Updated Start Here!

I updated my blog posts outline to include posts from 2026. I am thankful for the opportunity to work through and share my own healing little by little. Thanks for reading!

Carrying Sheaves - A Blog

1. The Beginning

1. Welcome to Carrying Sheaves - a quick introduction to who I am https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2023/12/

2. Why Now? - on why I choose to begin writing 4 ½ years after my son passed away https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2023/12/why-now.html

3. Love Story - a look at how my husband and I met and built our family by God’s grace https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/02/love-story.html

4. One Thousand Gifts - on how the book One Thousand Gifts and the practice of gratitude shaped and prepared me for the trials to come https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/01/one-thousand-gifts.html

5. The First Tears - a post about the loss of my sister, MaryJo https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/03/the-first-tears.html

6. The Story - a post about the days right before and right after Oliver died, a testimony to God’s sovereignty and faithfulness https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/02/the-story.html

7. Carrying Each Other’s Burden’s - a tribute to those who have helped me long the way https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/01/carrying-each-others-burdens.html

2. Sowing with Tears

1. Sowing with Tears - a post about how the blog got it’s name and all I have learned through Psalm 126:5-6 https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/01/sowing-with-tears.html

2. Tension - an acknowledgement that everyone grieves differently and this creates tension in our relationships https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/01/tension.html?m=1 

3. Book Review: Through the Eyes of a Lion - a review of the book that had the most influence on me in my early grief journey and continues to provide hope and help today https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/01/book-review-through-eyes-of-lion.html

4. Songs for Mourning with Hope - a few song recommendations that have been a big help to me as I grieved https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/02/songs-for-mourning-with-hope.html

5. 10,000 Reasons - a look at how God used a song to help me grieve both Oliver and MaryJo https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/04/10000-reasons.html

6. Memories are Funny Things - on what happens to memories and a reminder to remember and press on https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/11/memories-are-funny-things.html

3. Carrying Seeds

1. Harvest from God’s Word - a look at all God taught me about grief as I opened my Bible each week for three years with a Bible Study Fellowship group in eastern Washington https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/02/harvest-from-gods-word.html

2. Answers to Prayer - a post describing how God taught me to pray again after the loss of Oliver https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/04/answers-to-prayer.html

3. Called to Tell Our Stories - how God reminded me that we are called to share the stories of God’s faithfulness to us with others https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/04/called-to-tell-our-stories.html

4. Early Lessons from Sharing My Story - a few things I have learned from writing the blog and taking other opportunities to share my story of the loss of Oliver and God’s faithfulness in our grief https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/04/early-lessons-from-sharing-my-story.html

5. I Wanted to Throw the Book… I Made a List Instead - a list of ways God is at work in our suffering https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/05/i-wanted-to-throw-book-i-made-list.html

6. Reap that Joy - a song by Rend Collective based on Psalm 126 https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/11/rend-collective-reap-that-joy.html

7. Unless a Seed - a post about John 12:23-36 https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/07/unless-seed.html

8. Invite Grief This Christmas - a reflection on grief during Christmas https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/12/invite-grief-this-christmas.html

4. Fear

1. Fear After Child Loss - the first post in a series about the fear I felt after the loss of Oliver https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/05/fear-after-child-loss.html

2. God Gave Us Ash - a look at the way God used our dog to help me feel the fear I needed to work through https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/05/god-gave-us-ash.html

3. More Thoughts on Fear: habits, grace, afraid of being afraid - the final post in the series about fear after child loss https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/05/god-gave-us-ash.html

4. Why Are You Afraid? - a question that can help in the face of mounting fears https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/09/why-are-you-afraid.html

5. Grief Stirred

1. Maple Syrup Making and Reflections on Family - a post describing facing grief, letting it stir up feelings, and trusting that it will settle a little more comfortably after each stirring https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/03/maple-syrup-making-and-reflections-on.html

2. The Body of Christ - a post about grieving, remembering, and celebrating with others https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/03/the-body-of-christ.html

3. Happy Easter! - a look at the special meaning Easter takes on after the loss of a loved one https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/03/happy-easter.html

4. Five Years - a letter to Oliver written five years after his passing https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/07/five-years.html

5. A Quick Thought on Doubt https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/08/a-quick-thought-on-doubt.html

6. Milestones - a look at the challenges on facing milestones after child loss https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/09/milestones.html

7. Reflections on Grief - a post about what my grief looks like 5 ½ years after Oliver died https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/02/reflections-on-grief.html

8. The Word of the Lord Endures Forever - a reflection on six years after Oliver’s passing https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/07/the-word-of-lord-endures-forever.html

9. You Would Be Here - a reflection on seven years after MaryJo’s passing https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/08/you-would-be-here.html

6. God at Work

1. My Writing Journey - a look at how childhood dreams of being an author came true in unexpected ways https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/06/my-writing-journey.html

2. A Mom’s Perspective on Siblings and Child Loss - on answering the question: could I believe that my daughter’s faith would not be destroyed by this valley but that God would build it here? https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/06/a-moms-perspective-on-siblings-and.html

3. Blessings - a look at how God longs to bless us right now and the many shapes that can take https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/07/blessings.html

4. Fruitful - a post about how God tends his garden https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/07/fruitful.html

5. A Parenting Lesson Learned From Child Loss - https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/08/a-parenting-lesson-learned-from-child.html

6. A Reminder from Glorious Autumn - a quick look at how God’s ways are better than our ways https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/10/a-reminder-from-glorious-autumn.html

7. Healing Grace in Children’s Books - a list of children’s books that have helped me and my family in our grief https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/10/healing-grace-in-childrens-books.html

8. Nothing is Wasted - a review of the Nothing is Wasted podcast and book https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/10/nothing-is-wasted.html

9. Perfection - a look at letting go of perfection and watching God do the work https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/11/perfection.html

10. Answered Prayer - a look at a recent answer to a prayer https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/03/answered-prayer.html

11. Another Birthday - a quick look at all the feelings as we celebrate another one of Oliver’s birthdays https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/10/another-birthday.html

12. Sometimes Growth is Slow - a description of a time I realized a lot of growth had taken place, but so slowly it was hard to tell https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/04/sometimes-growth-is-slow.html

13. Review of Seasons of Sorrow by Tim Challies https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/05/review-of-seasons-of-sorrow-by-tim.html

14. Restoration - a look at all the ways God’s restoration is awesome https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/12/restoration.html

15. Return - a different look at God’s restoration https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/12/return.html

7. Eternity

1. Work in Heaven: A Fresh Perspective - a look at the question: what will we be doing in heaven? https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/07/work-in-heaven-fresh-perspective.html

2. On Diabetes and What Remains - a few thoughts on Oliver’s diabetes diagnosis and how I remember him now https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/08/homeschool-plan-for-2024-2025-school.html

3. A Sweet and Golden 16 - a look at birthdays and Psalm 84:10a Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/10/a-sweet-and-golden-16.html

4. To the Victorious - a post about Revelation 2-3 and the eternal rewards God promises those who remain faithful to Him https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/11/to-victorious.html 

5. Today - as we look forward to eternity, grief also reminds us the only day we are promised is today https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/12/today.html

6. Caught Up Together - a post about 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/01/caught-up-together.html

7. Thoughts on Suffering and Eternity - a reminder that we are called to be groaning conquerors https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/11/thoughts-on-suffering-and-eternity.html

8. Random Updates

1. Light of Christmas - a few update pictures from Christmas 2024 - https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/01/light-of-christmas.html

2. Janet’s Homeschool Day in the Life (with a 13-year-old) - a post about what an ordinary day looks like in our homeschool https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/03/janets-homeschool-day-in-life-with-13.html

3. Things I Don’t Want to Throw - a list of things I was loving in May 2024 https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/05/things-i-dont-want-to-throw.html

4. Thoughts While Traveling - a quote from a Eugene Peterson book and marveling at a God who knows, sees, understands, forgives, extends grace, blesses, and redeems in the midst of the hard, the impossible, the ordinary, the exciting, the nerve wracking, and the memorable https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/06/thoughts-while-traveling.html

5. Homeschool Plan for the 2024-2025 School Year - a look at my approach to planning and what I have planned for the 2024-2025 school year https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/08/homeschool-plan-for-2024-2025-school.html

6. Where Am I? - an update on my life from August 2024 https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/08/where-am-i.html

7. Counting My Blessings - a week of gratitude from September 2024 https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/09/counting-my-blessings.html

8. A Thanksgiving List - November 2024 https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/11/a-thanksgiving-list.html

9. Things I am Loving This Christmas Season - December 2024 https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/12/things-i-am-loving-this-christmas-season.html

10. Blogging in the New Year - blogging goals for 2025 https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/12/blogging-in-new-year.html

11. Homeschool Day in the Life with a 14-year-old - another post about what an ordinary day looks like in our homeschool https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/02/homeschool-day-in-life-with-14-year-old.html

12. Celebrating Lent - a list of ideas and activities for celebrating Lent https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/03/celebrating-lent.html

13. Homeschooling Is - a look at all the different ways to describe homeschooling https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/03/homeschooling-is.html

14. A Wedding Anniversary - a reflection on 20 years of marriage https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/05/a-wedding-anniversary.html

15. Reflecting on June - a time of deep contentedness mixed with longing for a more perfect world https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/06/reflecting-on-june.html

16. Homeschool Plan for the 2025-2026 School Year https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/08/homeschool-plan-for-2025-2026-school.html

17. Giving Thanks in a Busy Season - a gratitude list from September 2026 https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/09/giving-thanks-in-busy-season.html

9. Devotional 

1. Rush Your Life - a few thoughts from the Song “Take Your Time” by Joseph O’Brien https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/01/rush-your-life.html

2. Laughing in Church - a timely reminder to worship and not to worry about what to eat and what to wear https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/02/laughing-in-church.html

3. Fruitful - a look at leaning on God https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/09/fruitful.html

4. The Lord Has Done Great Things for Us - an advent devotional https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2024/12/the-lord-has-done-great-things-for-us.html

5. Lessons Learned from Moving - a list of 8 things I learned over the last 19 or so years of moving with the Army https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/02/lessons-learned-from-moving.html

6. Reflections on Holy Week - some scattered thoughts about what Holy Week means to me https://carryingsheaves.blogspot.com/2025/04/reflections-on-holy-week.html

Invite Grief This Christmas

I ran across a social media post the other day which said, "No one invites grief for Christmas". In its full context the author was pointing out how hard it was as a grieving person to be around people who are making merry and expecting you to do the same even if you are grieving. Thankfully, I have been blessed to be around family and friends who have been understanding of my grief. I also say, "Invite grief for Christmas!"

Grief has always been a part of Christmas. Mary and Joseph were away from family, had ruined reputations, and couldn't find a place to stay. It's hard to picture shepherds without thinking about some of the hardships they must have faced. Mary heard from Simeon, "This child is destined to cause the falling and rising of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be spoken against, so that the thoughts of many hearts will be revealed. And a sword will pierce your own soul too." (Luke 2:34b-35). The kings brought gifts but also the wrath of Herod, and Mary, Joseph, and Jesus had to flee for Egypt while all the boys in Bethlehem under the age of two were killed. And the whole reason Jesus came was to bear our sorrows. Surely he took up our pain and bore our suffering, yet we considered him punished by God, stricken by him, and afflicted. Isaiah 53:4

Grief has always been a part of Christmas. Early Christians chose to celebrate Christmas on December 25th, during a dark, cold, hungry month of the year. Family members pass away and are no longer with us at Christmas. We fail to love one another well and get along. Wars and disasters are commonplace. The work of preparing for Christmas is stressful. We are often called to wait. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, grieving the death of his wife and the serious Civil War injury to his son, wrote in "I Heard the Bells of Christmas Day": And in despair I bowed by head: "There is no peace on earth," I said, "For hate is strong, and mocks the song Of peace on earth, good will to men."

Grief has always been a part of Christmas. Each person has their own unique circumstances that bring them grief. Military deployments, being far from home, the loss of my sister, the loss of my son, a season of waiting, and a friend with cancer have marked and continue to mark Christmas for me. What griefs do you carry with you into Christmas? I say invite them! Name these griefs out loud. Sing the carols, cherish the memories, hang the stockings, cry the tears, bake the cookies, and don't try to hold the dizzying agony at bay. Instead, invite it, and let your grief feel the full weight of Christmas:

The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of deep darkness a light has dawned... For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Isaiah 9:2, 6

A shoot will come up from the stump of Jesse; from his roots a Branch will bear fruit. The Spirit of the Lord will rest on him - the Spirit of wisdom and of understanding, the Spirit of counsel and of might, the Spirit of the knowledge and fear of the Lord - and he will delight in the fear of the Lord. Isaiah 11:1-3

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have everlasting life." John 3:16

Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. My Father's house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. John 14:3

'He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death' or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. Revelation 21:4

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. Hebrews 10:23.

When our griefs feel the full weight of Christmas, we have hope and we feel our gratitude and joy more fully. Let's invite grief this Christmas.

A song that beautifully illustrates this idea is "O Come All You Unfaithful." I am loving the acoustic version that was released this year: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_FA1aV4mqCk&list=RD_FA1aV4mqCk&start_radio=1